ASHLEY SPIVEY’S BLOG: EPISODE 9

It’s fantasy suite time!

I think Ben is just really pumped to almost be done with this season…But first, Ben has a date with Nicki.

When Ben is in high places, like the top of this mountain, he tends to say “Oh my Dad.” I take this as a bad sign for Nicki when he says, “Oh my word.”

Nicki is really putting herself out there though…

Especially when she wants to scream her love from Ben from the mountaintops.

Ben is giving Nicki some pretty bad signals during this date but I’m pretty sure she wasn’t picking up on them.

Ben wants 4 kids and Nicki wants 2 kids. Normal people would compromise with 3 kids but Ben is just looking for reasons to eliminate Nicki at this point.

This might be one of the least sexy fantasy suite bedrooms I’ve ever seen. Also, I hate when there are too many pillows on the bed – they really interfere with the amount of space to roll around the bed. Also, it kind of ruins the mood when you have to stand there and take them off the bed. Before anything, Nicki brings up how much it meant to her that Ben thought their Dads were similar. Note to Nicki – don’t remind people that their Dad died. It’s maybe the worst thing you can do to get someone in the mood.

Ben doesn’t really care though and he continues to have a penchant for watersports.

Lindzi forgot that it’s cold in Switzerland and Ben forgot to be a gentleman.

They going to repel down the side of a cliff and they both couldn’t be more excited!!!

As they are repelling, Ben says “Oh my Dad,” which means he feels close to his Dad at this moment. I also think it kind of means that his Dad would approve of Lindzi. So far, he has only said this to Courtney and Lindzi. Bye bye Nicki.

They share some time in the hot tub and Lindzi looks at Ben’s mouth/neck/anywhere but his eyes for 80% of the conversation. Seriously, why is she always looking down? Then it’s time for dinner. I would give y’all a summary of what they said, but I think their conversations are SO BORING so I’m just going to give you their thoughts and important points…

(Pay attention to how many times Lindzi says totally or kinda, chica loves those words.)

Lindzi basically just repeated the same three things she always says during this convo: I really got my heart broken a year ago, I had a lot of guards up, I love horses!

It’s time for Ben and Lindzi to get busy and he decides that dress wasn’t sexy enough so he puts Lindzi in one of his button-downs. I cringe when I see all the pillows again.

See how awkward it is to lay on all those tiny pillows. Also, we can see your butt Lindzi!

It’s time for Ben and the Reformed Devil’s date. No lie, I can usually take screen grabs of at least 15 awesome (and by awesome I mean horrible) Courtney faces. I maybe got 3 during this episode – she’s really changing y’all!

On a serious note, Ben talks so much more and acts completely comfortable around Courtney. He also can’t stop touching her.

I did think their little jig was cute.

“Hey cow” is for amateurs. I would have cracked up if they went cow tippin’!

Courtney says through a serious of ITMs and voiceovers that she feels really badly about how she’s treated the girls.

I guess we are all supposed to act like she didn’t say some pretty awful things to the girls TO THEIR FACES. Maybe this process was hard, but as someone that went through it, I NEVER felt the need to be mean to anyone! I knew I was on camera and they would definitely use anything mean I said.

I still haven’t seen any actual tears fall out of Courtney’s eyes.

Then they have this eerily convenient talk where they address all the issues we have with Courtney. I could care less at this point. I think they are perfect for each other. I don’t know her and I don’t have to like her to admit that they are well suited for each other. I think I just always like the love story better when I don’t think the final one is a mean person.

Ben basically says to Courtney that she doesn’t need to apologize to him, in fact – she’s addressed all his issues. No it’s time for less talking and more sexy times!

Then we got to see a promo for Emily as the Bachelorette and I was psyched to see my besties from my season! I don’t know if anyone else thought about this, but if the whole point of the day was to get Emily excited for her season, maybe they shouldn’t have shown her a movie where the girl’s love of her life died? Couldn’t they have shown her the Notebook or something?

Back to Ben. Kacie came back and she’s proving the best way to get a guy back after a breakup is by looking amazing when you see him again.

Ben is super surprised to see her – THIS NEVER HAPPENS ON THIS SHOW!

She looks pretty hesitant to touch him at first.

But she reveals that the real reason she is here is to get closure.

Here’s what Ben basically says…

(We had no sexual chemistry.)

(I never saw you being the final one.) If Ben really thought this, he should have let Kacie go a long time ago and not met her parents!!!

Then Kacie tries to warn Ben about Courtney one last time…

His faces pretty much say it all!

Once again, Ben could care less that everyone hates Courtney. He’s totally irritated now and he just wants her to leave.

Kacie is still really in love with Ben though.

So in love, that she finds it impossible to walk back to her room after talking with him.

It’s rose ceremony time and I knew what was going to happen at this point so I kinda stopped paying attention.

Ben admits that it’s a hard decision.

Chris asks Ben if he’d like Kacie to participate in the rose ceremony. Ben wants nothing to do with this. The way he looks at the ladies during the rose ceremony is totally creeping me out because you know he is fantasizing about the past week the entire time. In the end, he not surprisingly eliminates Nicki and Chris Harrison smiles when he tells Nicki to say her goodbyes. That was harsh bro, even Ben agrees.

Ben walks Nicki out but she doesn’t seem that in to him touching her with hands that have been with 2 other girls that he liked better.

You can tell Nicki is pissed and very hurt to be eliminated in this episode. I don’t blame her at all. You can tell she is totally regretting her actions from this week.

Nicki – you are so naturally beautiful and so fun! You have a great positive outlook on life and the next guy that is lucky enough to be with you will prove that Ben did you a favor by eliminating you. You will get your wedding one day and I promise you will be a wonderful mother and wife!!!

So what did y’all think of this episode? Do y’all like Courtney now? Do you think there’s a chance Ben could pick Lindzi?

Be sure to head on over to http://www.saynotocosmo.com for more Bachelor recaps, relationship advice, and random musings by me!

43 Comments »

  1. I really think if Ben picks Courtney there will maybe major issues with the other two women in his life, his sister and mom. Ben has made it very clear that they are a huge part of his life and I don’t see Courtney taking to kindly to that. She is very very needy and I think she will crack being jealous of his relationship with his mom & sister. How she interacted with the other women should have been a huge red flag for Ben and how that would play out with his own family.

    Comment by kathy-n-zona — March 2, 2012 @ 11:44 am

  2. this is funny, especially the pics of Ben conversation with kacie.

    Comment by patricia — March 2, 2012 @ 11:55 am

  3. omg you’re hilarious! love your blogs! (and my money was on JP the entire time by the way). I must say tho, you’ve gotten too skinny :(

    Comment by gina — March 2, 2012 @ 12:12 pm

  4. Love it, still the best blog of any, makes me lmao all the time. You nail it every week, Ashley. I think Ben and Courtney are perfectly suited too. Both have BIG egos, love to be naked, make weird faces, seem rathercold & uncaring people, and not horrible at communication.

    Comment by Melissa — March 2, 2012 @ 12:24 pm

  5. You made a lot of good points. I love your photo captions. Your blog is good. Always! Good job!

    Comment by Brianaarie — March 2, 2012 @ 12:26 pm

  6. Gina, sorry baby, this is Ashley SPIVEY’s blog, not Ashley HEBERT (who is engaged to JP). But you did make me laugh. Of course I’m not laughing AT you but WITH you (and you WILL laugh when you figure this out). Great job on the blog, Ahsley, it really is funny!!

    Comment by Juli — March 2, 2012 @ 12:34 pm

  7. Awesome blog today, Ashley. The Kacie B. and Ben convo. had me laughing. You are so funny and so on point!

    Comment by Phoebe — March 2, 2012 @ 12:36 pm

  8. too funny! love your blog!

    Comment by Courtney — March 2, 2012 @ 1:16 pm

  9. right on once again! of all bachelor nation blogs, yours is BY FAR my favorite!

    agree 100% — and yes, who cares how devilish Courtney is as an individual?! the point is that the two of them are PERFECT for each other and make a “great” team!

    Comment by FJ — March 2, 2012 @ 1:34 pm

  10. Didn’t like the “joke” about cow tipping. I think that would have been a mean thing to do.

    Comment by Mel L — March 2, 2012 @ 1:56 pm

  11. UGH go blow that turd face looking bf u have, he’s as immature as you are.

    Comment by BRAD SAID YOUR A PIG — March 2, 2012 @ 2:00 pm

  12. Your blogs are just too fun! I look forward to them every week.

    Comment by V. — March 2, 2012 @ 2:11 pm

  13. Did this episode make me like Courtney? Well…I don’t think we’d be friends in real life. But did it make me like “Ben & Courtney”–yes, they are a good match. He doesn’t even seem to care that her words hurt the other ladies, just that it “made it hard on him”….so, he was more concerned that he got a lot of crap about her than he was that she hurts people. Nice. And remember skinny-dipping episode? He said in his blog that he wasn’t even thinking of the other women’s feelings when he did that. meaning….they are both extremely inconsiderate & selfish people, and it’s not important to either one of them that they find a life partner who cares about others and shows some class. Hopefully they will both come out of this and see that those characteristics are just not cool.
    Great blog–love the screen shots!

    Comment by Beth — March 2, 2012 @ 2:15 pm

  14. PS–the “Practice Making faces like Courtney” screenshot: bwahahahahhaha!!! Funniest thing I’ve seen all week!

    Comment by Beth — March 2, 2012 @ 2:17 pm

  15. Ashley,
    I never, ever, comment on blogs, but am making an exception just to tell you how much I LOVE your posts!!!! They make me laugh out loud – an admittedly tough feat for me – and I eagerly look forward to them every week. Hands down the best bachelor recaps I’ve ever, ever seen. I hope you keep doing this for future seasons – you are spot on when it comes to the ‘characters’ and Ben.
    Thank you so much for all the time and effort you obviously put into this – it’s just so awesome. :-)

    Comment by Kate — March 2, 2012 @ 4:05 pm

  16. Oh, and the screenshots of Ben’s ‘thoughts’ while talking to Kacie B – so hilarious – absolutely brilliant!

    Comment by Kate — March 2, 2012 @ 4:06 pm

  17. Geez, comment 3 – so much for never leaving comments! Also wanted to mention that I LOVED that you picked up on Ben not offering his coat to Lindzi when she was obviously freezing, (and he even commented on it!). What a gentleman. Not. Such a douche.

    Comment by Kate — March 2, 2012 @ 4:08 pm

  18. KATE COMMENTS ARE ASHLEY SPIVEY, SO OBVIOUS, GOT THE ISP ADDY TO

    Comment by lmao — March 2, 2012 @ 4:20 pm

  19. LOVE your blog posts! They are so hilarious every week. I am so happy whenever I see you’ve posted. Thanks for your hysterical analysis.

    Comment by Kim — March 2, 2012 @ 4:24 pm

  20. funny blog. Well done

    Comment by reid — March 2, 2012 @ 5:23 pm

  21. funnyfunnyfunny!

    Comment by Gail Venanzi — March 2, 2012 @ 5:44 pm

  22. I like your blog version better ;) It’s more REALZ! Cant believe they censored you.

    Comment by Susan :) — March 2, 2012 @ 10:56 pm

  23. you’re so funny! i loooove your style of blog, it’s unique from all the others and so ENTERTAINING! :) and i dk… i sorta believe Courtney in that the way she is to Ben shows that she CAN be sweet and DOES have a human side so anyone who has a human side would feel bad for the kinda stuff she said right? i just hate thinking shes 100% evil but it’s always possible that hindsight told her she could lose Ben/the competition/any good publicity if she kept up her evil antics.

    Comment by Tara — March 3, 2012 @ 1:47 am

  24. I just think it’s interesting that Emily made a comment earlier in the season comparing Courtney to an autistic child. That’s pretty awful but no one harped on that… no one came up with names for Emily, and she has had her fair share of rude moments. And when Courtney apologies at the WTA and the women respond rudely, aren’t they being just as bad as Courtney was when Emily apologized? No one knows if Courtney is sincere, but how do we know Emily wasn’t told to apologize by producers? Courtney caught shit because she didn’t respond well to an apology. It looks like the women are about to do the same thing. I guess it’s ok this time cause it’s not Courtney?

    Comment by Martha M — March 3, 2012 @ 7:25 am

  25. Ashley, Just like your comments on Episode 8, you were hilarious with Episode 9 and made me laugh out loud. After last episode, I like Kacie even more. Loved that she she stood up for herself, telling BEN that SHE would make the decisions in her life, not her parents. But she still respected her parents. Tough to do on TV & she did a great job. I’m NOT excusing or liking THE DEVIL any more, but I am liking BEN LESS. –Not to the point of lowering him to Courtney’s level, but he is getting pretty UNCARING. I’m not so sure if his Mom or sister are “caring” people either. BEN is about money & ego, and is after money, looks & sex. I don’t think he could have a good / healthy friendship with a woman.

    Comment by Terri — March 3, 2012 @ 11:16 am

  26. Censored!! Ashley, does that not tell you SOMETHING??
    Perhaps you thrive on what you believe to be shock value.
    People are not one bit shocked by anything that comes out of your mouth … your disgusting sleazy comments are expected.
    Poor Nicki. Let’s hope she will be calling you out on the extremely personal statements you have made re. her appearance and her behavior. It is nothing less than slander. WHO you do think you are?? YOU have NO idea what goes on behind closed doors.
    So happy you are not my daughter, sister or aqauintance

    Comment by Grace — March 3, 2012 @ 6:00 pm

  27. and yes, I mispelled aquaintance!

    Comment by Grace — March 3, 2012 @ 6:02 pm

  28. To Grace (who commented 3/3 6pm) & ya’ll: I don’t think Ashley Spivey was trashing Nicki at all. Didn’t you read what she wrote: by Ashley S. ” Nicki – you are so naturally beautiful and so fun! ……. and the next guy that is lucky enough to be with you … You will be a wonderful mother and wife!” Maybe I missed something.

    Comment by Terri — March 3, 2012 @ 9:39 pm

  29. No Terri, you didn’t miss anything. :)

    I am referring to statements Ashley made on The TV Spot, ‘Gossip with Getz’
    If you didn’t watch it, you are a lucky gal.

    Comment by Grace — March 3, 2012 @ 11:52 pm

  30. Bet Ben will pick Courtney – and he deserves everything tha happens to him. Don’t know, though, maybe its just a thing to keep the ratings up -have a love to hate woman in there. Final word, all of the other ladies were too nice and sweet and deserve better than Ben. Would definitely not want him in our family!

    Comment by Theresa — March 4, 2012 @ 7:17 am

  31. I like how you pointed out his penchant for activities in water….yet another reason why him and Courtney are a match!

    Comment by Lola — March 4, 2012 @ 12:21 pm

  32. Grace – I didn’t say anything bad about Nicki on Gossip with Getz. In fact I’m pretty sure I had only good things to say about her on there or on this blog. I’ve been a huge fan of Nicki for a while and I’ve said time and again that I think she is the most naturally pretty person on that show. Comments can be taken out of context and blown out of proportion and a lot of what we say on Gossip with Getz is meant in jest and also to just try to make people not take this show so seriously. Maybe try to have a better sense of humor while reading this blog (which obviously you don’t like so why are you reading it?) or while watching me on Gossip with Getz. Read the end of this blog and I have nothing but nice things to say about Nicki.

    Also, I just think it’s funny to comment on how disgusting and mean my comments are but then end your comments to me with a mean comment. That is the definition of hypocrisy Grace.

    Comment by Ashley — March 4, 2012 @ 2:31 pm

  33. Thank you everyone else for your comments on this blog and for always supporting me this season. I enjoy reading your thoughts and it’s been fun blogging with y’all! Let me know if you have any questions or concerns or suggestions! @ashleyspivey

    Comment by Ashley — March 4, 2012 @ 2:33 pm

  34. I have a question, that no one has ever addressed. It seems at this point that Ben has chosen Courtney. The producers have given her the worst edit possible. I don’t care if she deserved it or not, but they are not protecting their Bachelor. Ben is not the star of the show. They have given Courtney more air time than him. Why on earth are they all friends? If I was the Bachelor or Bachlorette and they did not protect me or my chosen one, I couldn’t even pretend to be friends.

    Honesty would be appreciated.

    Comment by Jacquie — March 4, 2012 @ 6:00 pm

  35. Are you going to do a blog on Emily’s season? I love reading your blog. I can’t wait to hear what happens after this is all over. It will never last with Courtney.

    Comment by Elizabeth — March 5, 2012 @ 7:14 am

  36. This absolutely cracked me up.

    Wish I had discovered your blog sooner.

    This has been the worst season ever of The Bachelor.

    To answer your question, no, I cannot stand Courtney and I can no longer stand Ben. He absolutely disgusts me.

    Comment by Sue — March 5, 2012 @ 5:03 pm

  37. Disappointed in tonites episode. Blah!

    Comment by Theresa — March 5, 2012 @ 8:43 pm

  38. This is the first time I’ve read your blog and it’s wonderful.

    Thanks!

    Comment by karynr — March 6, 2012 @ 9:08 pm

  39. I noticed Ames is having a caption contest with one of the pics he posted on his twitter account. Hope u don’t mind my using ur space to mention it. Just figured you bachelor nation bloggers could come up the best ones because you guys have met him and your funny. Some of your followers can be pretty clever as well. thanks.

    Comment by Shelagh — March 7, 2012 @ 4:42 am

  40. Ben Flajnik Cream Dream http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XWt_DifczOM

    Comment by andy — March 7, 2012 @ 7:35 pm

  41. I am so leaving reality steve’s blog for yours!!! Way to go Ashley! You are funny without being rude!

    Comment by Judes — March 9, 2012 @ 11:14 am

  42. If Ben picks Courtney I don’t see her having 4 kids. Because she wants all of his attention all the time. And I don’t think that would be the kind of girl his mom would approve of. I know I wouldn’t. I think it should have been Kacie or Lindzi that he should have picked from.

    Comment by Pennie — March 10, 2012 @ 8:39 pm

  43. i wish them the best because him and her they thinking and talk same but i don’t think she will be he wife she so mean and lie i love see him with Lindzi Lindzi she so nice and good looking lady :)

    Comment by pam — March 13, 2012 @ 6:43 pm

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