David Good’s Bachelorette Blog: Episode 3

Episode 3 has some surprises in store.  I am hoping in this episode we get to see a date cleaning bathrooms and then maybe a competition seeing who can mow the best front yard.

The first date is a one-on-one with Chris.  She really likes and has a schoolgirl crush on Chris.  The first part of the date is the two climbing the side of a building.  Dang it!  I was hoping for some mowing and cleaning toilets.

Emily started freaking out because of some thunder in the background and Chris does a good job reassuring her she is ok.  They seem cute together.  He has moved up near the top of my list.

WOW!  Did not know Chris was only 25.  He seems way more mature than that.  Emily says his age is a “red flag.” When he tells her his age and her face is priceless.  She makes a face like Chris just farted at dinner.  LOL.

Next is a surprise…YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSS. LUKE BRYAN!!!!!!!!!!  He is a stud!  Love his music.   After dancing Chris goes in for a long kiss.

I did not think we would see her kissing many guys because of Ricki, but looks like I was wrong on that one.  I think we might see A LOT of it the way this is going.

What are your thoughts on this?  Wrong or ok?

The Group date is next.

She brings them all to a park and has a football.  She then tells the guys to hang out and walks off.  OH NOOO.  It’s time to meet her friends.  The MOM group!  This should be good.  These women are trying to act all tough but are drooling over these guys.

I am pretty sure this is the hottest group of guys they have ever been in contact with and they are taking full advantage!  I think they are having trouble keeping their hormones in check.

OHHH man!  MORE KIDS.  Kids everywhere!  They came running from every direction.   Emily wants to see how the guys all interact with the kids.  From my point of view they all did pretty well.

Ryan comes over to Emily and chats with the ladies.  He makes a huge mistake saying, “if you get fat after we get married I’ll still love ya just not on ya.”  Hahaha.  Fat girls need lovin’ too Ryan!  Emily DID NOT like this comment!  No girl wants to hear that.  It really is a mean thing to say to someone especially when trying to find love with them.

Ryan was one of my favorites at the beginning but the more I watch of him the more he reminds me of Brad and I can see him starting to get sucked into “playing the game” and that is not a good sign.  He has definitely dropped a few numbers on my list.

The boys clean up and they all head to have drinks and spend some one-on-one time with Emily.

 

Doug has a great talk with her bringing her to tears about his upbringing.   I like Doug so far.  I am really curious as to how much about what was in the news is true.  I read that he hit his ex and pulled a gun on her and fired into the front yard.  The article was on wetpaint.com.  Really sad if this is true and something Emily should know if it is. This is not someone you want on the show if this is true.

Tony is having a hard time and really missing his son and deciding if he should really be there.  He sits down with Emily and starts crying about it.  This is cute but it has been 6 days at this point buddy.  Chill out with the crying.  You are not the first person to be away from their kid for a week.  I mean jeez.

This next space we will leave blank for the amount of time Tony Cries.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

My father went on road trips trucking longer than he has been gone, and he can’t handle it?  Come on man.  I mean I am glad you love your son but you don’t have to breast-feed him.  He is 5.  I had 3 jobs and 2 wives at 5 years old.  Man up!

Arie gets the next one-on-one date.  They are going to Dollywood.   They ride some rollercoasters and then are writing a love song and Dolly comes out and surprises them with a song.  Emily is so excited.

I am a huge country fan but have never got into Dolly’s music much, but Emily loved it!  Arie and Emily dance and I gotta say he needs some work in this department.  They say you can tell how good a guy is in bed by how he moves dancing.  Is this true?  If so Arie is in trouble.  Lol.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Emily and him are having a real serious convo at dinner and she interrupts him and picks up the rose and says “I am really just looking for a guy who can be open and honest” like she is going to send him home and his face DROPS like, what!?!?   Then she laughs and says, “I am just kidding” and gives him the rose.  That was hilarious and good to see her funny personality coming out.

Kalon sits down with her and is super weird.  First off he looks like a serial killer and is sun burnt real bad so his face is glowing orange to make it worse.  He then snaps on Emily to follow through with his serial killer look saying, “I like hearing you talk but let me finish” in a very rude way.  Emily is like whoa!

He seems to be turning into exactly what you all said he was from the jump – a spoiled little frat boy.

The rest of the show is pretty boring so I am going to dedicate the rest to my man Alessandraoseana.  The convo he had with Emily was so awkward and he made her feel so uncomfortable, I was sure he was a serial killer.  Pretty sure he had 3 bodies in a freezer at home and 2 under his long bangs.

However after watching the outtakes I was laughing so hard I think I peed my pants a little.  This guy is hilarious.  You have to laugh at him because I don’t think he means any harm, he is just goofy.  He tells Emily’s friends that he had a serious relationship…WITH HIS THIRD COUSIN and has cheated on a girl…WITH HIS THIRD COUSIN…had a one night stand…WITH HIS THIRD COUSIN.   He has a speech problem that makes it hard for him to communicate so he seems awkward but like he said he “is a gypsy and born to run.” Hahaha.  Laughing so hard at this.

At the rose ceremony Stevie went home.  This came as a huge surprise to me because I am pretty sure all single moms are looking for a 26 year old break dancing DJ from NJ to be a good father figure and husband.  I would rather smash my toes with a hammer then let this dork around my kid. Not in fear of him being mean to my kid, but that my kid might end up becoming a 26 year old break dancing DJ.

Have a great week!

D

22 Comments »

  1. hahahahaha i cannot stop laughing at your post. Hilarious! I agree 100% with everything you said!

    Comment by Laura — May 31, 2012 @ 1:43 pm

  2. Great blog again! you’re the one blogger on here that I always agree with 100%!

    Comment by OCrazy — May 31, 2012 @ 2:00 pm

  3. I think you are 100% on the mark with your blog. I laughed all the way through it, keep up the good work can’t wait to see what week 4 brings.

    Comment by Pat — May 31, 2012 @ 2:53 pm

  4. This was great–especially the huge blank space dedicated to the amount of time that Tony cried! Good thing she cut him loose. Really liked Chris until Sean got some screen time. Great abs on that boy–can’t blame the soccer moms for drooling over this one! Anyway, keep up the great blogs–always get a laugh out of them!!
    Ginny

    Comment by Ginny — May 31, 2012 @ 2:54 pm

  5. A lot of what’s on wetpaint.com is not true at all. Most of it is just stuff they make up, like most “news” sites.

    Love your blog!! :)

    Comment by Maddie — May 31, 2012 @ 4:54 pm

  6. You make me laugh!!! Great job on the recap.

    Comment by emm — May 31, 2012 @ 5:35 pm

  7. I think it’s just fine that Emily is kissing these guys even though she’s a mom. Being a mom doesn’t mean kissing is off limits… ESPECIALLY if you’re the Bachelorette. You’re almost expected to on a tv show like this. But no comment on the Emily/Arie kiss? :( :(

    Comment by istall91 — May 31, 2012 @ 10:10 pm

  8. It’s fine she’s kissing. Mommas have hormones too, especially at 26. It’s us moms of 3 in our 40′s who are way too tired to be kissing. Rather just have a glass of wine and take a nap. Unless of course… it’s with Sean…. ;-)

    Comment by Beth — May 31, 2012 @ 10:30 pm

  9. Everyone deserves love, and single parents are no exception, but to make out with lots of men on TV in my opinion is wrong. I didn’t mind seeing Emily on Brads season, because she was kissing one man. But to me it is entirely different with her being the Bachelorette and kissing lots of men.

    I keep going back to her daughter, who will some day google her mother and see everything we are seeing today. Not good!

    I also find it very interesting that at the beginning of this season, Fleiss, Harrison, and the producers were telling us it was going to be so great, and Emily deserves the best, blah, blah, blah. But from all the blogs I have been reading, Emily has more idiots cast on her season than Ashley, Ali and Jillian combined! All these girls deserved the utmost respect and great guys, not sure why they thought Emily should be treated differently.

    They were also looking for Emily to bring the ratings back up, and even the mess of Ben’s season had higher ratings. Notice how none of the producers are tweeting about that.

    I do wish Emily the best. Hopefully there is one man on this show that deserves her.

    Comment by tj — June 1, 2012 @ 4:41 am

  10. You make me laugh,nice post :D

    Comment by yoyogaaa — June 1, 2012 @ 6:43 am

  11. LOL!! Love your blogs!

    Comment by Tracey — June 1, 2012 @ 9:11 am

  12. People are so shocked by Emily kissing her suitors. Here are my thoughts (as per your request):

    Totally not wrong. How can she determine if there is any romantic chemistry with her & specific men if she doesn’t kiss them … ? I heard (in the grapevine) that she doesn’t go on the fantasy suite part of the final 3 dates, but c’mon, it’s just a kiss.

    Also – Jason had a son, and nobody complained about him getting down and dirty with a few of his ladies.
    Hot tub scene with Jill (I know you know what I’m talking about…)

    Anyways, anyone that bitches about this – needs to get a life or a couple kisses themselves.

    Comment by Siobhan — June 1, 2012 @ 11:10 am

  13. How can you call the cast “idiots” the Bachelor’s are and have always been more successful than most guys their age.

    Comment by Lisa — June 1, 2012 @ 11:47 am

  14. Lol Dave you are crushing on Emily therefore you re having trouble watching her make out with 3 guys in this episode right. And because Emily is so into Arie at this point you have to point out he may not be good in bed. Guess what? If bad dancing is an indicator then none of them are good in bed including Emily, Ryan and Chris haha I hope she does not pick anyone so you can have a shot…lol what a tool

    Comment by Confused — June 2, 2012 @ 1:21 pm

  15. Halarious!!!!!!

    Comment by Lc — June 3, 2012 @ 5:20 am

  16. Whahaha!!

    Definitely a humorous post there good job! Just finished reading Natalie’s as well =) Awesome job you guys!

    Comment by Marklin — June 3, 2012 @ 1:13 pm

  17. I love your recaps!! It’s always so fun seeing it from a mans perspective. I donate been a huge Emily fan since Brads season, so I’m all for her finding love. I don’t agree with the kissing so soon though, I remember an interview with Chris that she said she wished Brad would of saved some things for only her, kind of hypocritical ….AND she kissed Arie a the rose ceremony I was like whhhhhaaaaaaa

    Comment by Vanessa Renee — June 3, 2012 @ 5:01 pm

  18. Nice one Dave! I too was expecting one of the guys mowing the lawn. Sorry I have to disagree with the Brad comparison and no offense! Ryan kinda reminds me of you. You were very nice and quiet on that first night then you got a little carried away complementing Jillian after a couple of episodes! Ryan was pretty sweet about baking cookies now he says he won’t love Emily if she gets fat! De ja vous? Just saying. You are right that no girl wants to be told that. I’m amazed that Emily did not show Ryan the door at the Rose Ceremony though.

    Comment by Maria C — June 4, 2012 @ 2:22 am

  19. The funniest review I’ve read in forever! You actually made me laugh out loud. Thanks! I needed that.

    Comment by Deborah — June 4, 2012 @ 12:30 pm

  20. If Doug had really done that, he clearly would NOT have full custody of his son, which he DOES. I think that story is just something they made up because he specifically told Emily that he has full custody.

    Comment by Maddie — June 4, 2012 @ 4:02 pm

  21. I’m not sure how I missed this one last week… but I’m definitely laughing out loud reading it now! Can’t wait for the next one! :)

    Comment by Monica — June 5, 2012 @ 8:57 am

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