Michael Stagliano’s Bachelor Blog: Episode 5

Frogs! (Last time, I swear).  Welcome to week number 5…We are half way home, and waiting there in his family room with a firelight, a bed of roses and a puppy is Sean Lowe and his betrothed.  We just don’t know who it is YET!!

OH!!

The girls head to Montana this week to explore the great outdoors, and though Sean says he has never been, he does seem to fit the part of an outdoorsy kind of guy.  This week was essentially The ‘Utah’ episode of Ben Flanjik’s Season.

Here is how it all went down:

Lindsay gets the 1 on 1 date, and as a result I am immediately intrigued. (I think you were too).  She sheds some pretty sweet tears just realizing that she gets to spend time with him, and it is completely sincere, genuine and heartfelt.  Though it seems like we only got the ‘Cliff-notes version’ of this date… there is undeniable chemistry between them. They kiss A LOT, and after opening up to Sean about being an Army brat, they kiss some more…

Sean gives her the rose and announces the night isn’t over.

The whole town of Whitefish shows up… and I mean that literally… there were 300+ people at the mini-concert, and 300+ people live in Whitefish (I Googled it, seriously).  They dance and kiss, and this part of the date produces my favorite moment of the episode.  As they are dancing and kissing, Sean leans down and says, “We have come a long way since night one, huh?”  LOVED THIS, and it is exactly how I feel about them.  I just about wrote Lindsay off the list in that wedding dress, but she has done a complete 180 with me, and I love seeing the two of them fall for each other.  More, please…

Back at the house the group date is announced and we immediately learn Tierra and Jackie will be going on the dreaded 2-on-1.  Which, every season, is like suddenly flipping the channel and watching “How to Catch a Predator” on Dateline NBC with Chris Hanson… (NOT to be confused with Chris Harrison).  It is MAXIMUM awkward level.

But first!!

The girls make their way around a bend and we suddenly see, on camera, two goats stuck in feeding cage or sorts…and one the girls blurts out “are those dogs?!?!”….Ooooooohhhh BAD START.

The bad start gets worse because… dammit… it’s another competition, and if you have been reading my last few blogs I don’t even have to tell you how NOT excited I am to see these girls compete against each other… My suspicions are confirmed right away, once the Red and Blue teams hop in canoes and IMMEDIATELY paddle into the weeds.  Both boats go backwards and forwards, sideways at times, as my guess is that part of the race took a solid 15 minutes.

After some hay bail moving (yes I was half asleep by this point), some saw cutting (completely asleep) and some goat milk chugging… the RED teams gets the win.  The Blue team packs it up, packs it in, let me begin… I came to win, battle me that’s a sin…. (Oh my b-boy days, how I miss them)

Sean takes the girls to a bar/place/thing, and the back at the house/lodge the girls are visited by Chris Harrison… They all, (and rightfully so, because Chris = Bad News 90% off the time)…get very nervous, only to learn that they have been invited to the group date after all and WILL get to spend the rest of the night with Sean.

One, two, skip a few… The girls show up to the date and personally… I liked this move by Sean.  IT completely negates the competition…but guess what ladies… this isn’t a friggin’ competition!  It is about Sean spending time with girls he likes, and he LIKED some of the girls on the Blue Team.  Go Ahead Sean, Go Ahead dawg, I got your back. Hahaha.

After dodging some scowls by the red team all seems well… until… Dun Dun DUUUHHH!!!!

You guessed it…

TI-ER-AH  shows up and sneaks behind Sean while he is interviewing, and does what I would call… Paranormal Activity…RIGHT!?!?!  She was all out of focus, caught on a still cam, stayed quiet…sneaking up behind him… yikes.

Sean seems pleasantly surprised (unfortunately), she pulls him outside and dribbles on about… how hard this is, how confused she is, and…. I stopped listening, honestly, because at this point I was thinking… There is NO WAY Sean isn’t picking up on the red flags at this point. Their time together ends with Tierra skipping away into the night. Sean enters back into the den of lady lions and is met by AshLee and Catherine.

Forgive me for saying it again, but I just feel like BOTH of these one-on-one times were FORCED.  I do.  I know last week I got a lot of heat for saying it… but… Look, when Lindsay, Desiree, Sarah and Leslie are with him, the conversation and the kissing does NOT seem forced… I can’t help but feel like Catherine and Sean and in a smaller way, AshLee and Sean’s time together was unnatural.  AshLee talked about how she feels this, “is a fairy tale, She has a soul connection with Sean, how she adores him.”  And maybe I am being cynical here, but I just don’t think they have known each other on planet earth long enough for her to feel that way!!!  Am I nuts!?!?!  Let me know…

Daniella ends up getting the rose, and I am all for it, actually.  She is honest and open and vulnerable and GOES IN AN GETS THAT KISS… Kinda awesome, right?!?!

On to the 2 on 1

The warm fuzzies and butterflies quickly fade away.  It is Jackie vs. Tierra and it ain’t gonna be pretty.

The date starts of with a long awkward car ride, the girls hop out, mount some horses and unfortunately Jackie gets a horse whose name might just have been “gluestick.”  She spends the first part of the afternoon trailing Sean and Tierra, straining to hear what they are talking about, drowning in Tierra as she laughs and giggles and turns on the “glow.”

Jackie does get her time to strike once her and Sean get alone time and Jackie does a mildly convincing job of telling Sean that Tierra is… how do we say… “Not so good…” She tells him she flirted with a guy at the airport… Sean half-heartedly says, “that does worry me.”  And honestly, folks… we already know Jackie is going home.  In case you still had some hope, Tierra pulls out all the stops and tells Sean about her 5-year relationship that ended with her boyfriend passing away.  Well… now there is NO WAY Sean can’t give her the rose.  Well played (again) Tierra!  You should try Bachelor Pad…

Alas, Jackie says Adieu. Tierra smiles and laughs.  A LOT…almost too much.

…and we are left to a cocktail party that has as much cheer as a funeral home.  Sean and Desiree take a step back, Robyn threatens to get BGC on us, even Chris Harrison can’t help but point out how terrible the week was…

Not much to point out from this part of the episode.  Honestly, the conversation between Robyn and Tierra and Leslie was sophomoric and disjointed.  I couldn’t really tell what was going on, and didn’t feel like we learned anything new.  More to the point, Sean seemed confused as well.  He feels left in the dark not just about what is going with Tierra, but why none of the girls he likes are being honest with him…. and that makes sense…

On a lighter-side… After Chris announces Sean into the room during the Rose Ceremony…did you catch Catherine’s face?  It looked like someone shot her dog!  Hahaha. No worries, Catherine you are safe for another week. And so are all of you!

Thank you all for reading.  The comments were mixed last week, some very heated and mean spirited, and honestly, I don’t know which ones I enjoy more… hahaha.  The positive, sweet, agreeable ones, or the outlandishly, ridiculous, hate-filled rants… so much fun.

Hope you guys had a good weekend, and that your week is going well.

I’m singing more stuff on YouTube in the coming week, so be sure to hop on over there and SUBSCRIBE to my fun little channel so you can leave more comments there for me to read. I read them all, and LOVE them all. www.youtube.com/michaelstagliano

I’ll catch you on the flip side…(people still say that, right?)

LOVE,

Michael

31 Comments »

  1. There must be something going on off screen between the girls & Tierra. They even allude to it in that wacked out confrontation. But I still didn’t understand the point of it. And I’d like to start calling miss Tierrable Tierra Nightly because she’s drama every single night.

    Comment by Margaret — February 5, 2013 @ 2:17 pm

  2. I’ll have to disagree with you on both AshLee and Catherine. I don’t think AshLee and Catherine’s relationship with Sean are forced at all. AshLee is much older and she’s been through a lot and so I can see her just falling so quick and hard for Sean. As for Catherine, have you studied Sean’s body language and face? He GLOWS around her. He gets GIDDY around her. Not only that, he’s CONFIDENT in her and doesn’t have to worry about her and it’s almost week 6 and she hasn’t had a one on one date yet.

    Comment by Sum — February 5, 2013 @ 2:48 pm

  3. Michael! Always love your blog! Happy Birthday Yesterday! When are you coming back to Calgary for another concert :)

    Comment by Mandy — February 5, 2013 @ 3:03 pm

  4. Happy Belated Birthday Michael! You never cease to make me laugh while reading your recaps. I completely agree with you that AshLee and Sean’s conversations and time together seems forced. I don’t see that with Catherine though, I think they are really cute and playful together.

    And I really enjoyed the House of Pain lyrics thrown in there, awesomeness. Loving the new music, come to San Diego so I can see you live!

    Comment by Jess — February 5, 2013 @ 3:15 pm

  5. Happy Belated Birthday!

    Another good recap. And I agree with you on a lot…..the bad editing during the cocktail party, Sean being dumber than rocks about females and let’s not even talk about what a bad kisser he is!!!!

    Comment by Jessie — February 5, 2013 @ 3:31 pm

  6. I didn’t know it was your birthday yesterday! Happy Belated Birthday Michael! Loved your blog!It was very entertaining! I disagree with you on Catherine and AshLee, but that’s okay. :) Have a good week! xoxo

    Comment by Beth H — February 5, 2013 @ 3:51 pm

  7. SO happy you changed your mind on Lindsay! I think she’s adorable, sweet, and so natural! It doesn’t seem forced in the least bit. I wish we got to see more of the date. In Sean’s blog he talked about how she told him she was a wrestler in high school and so they wrestled and she won and according to Sean their convo on being an army beat was deeper than they showed. Ahhh love her along with Des!

    You’re spot on with Catherine. They just talk about how they think each other is attractive. She acts like a 14 year old girl. It seems so silly.

    Comment by Meghan — February 5, 2013 @ 4:21 pm

  8. Always laugh, best blog- what other shows can you write about so your loyal fans can have a daily laugh? Since you read these comments I’ve got a question for you (hopefully to be answered in your next blog) if you were in Sean’s position and all the ladies were telling you things about Tierra what would you do/think?

    Comment by Kate — February 5, 2013 @ 4:59 pm

  9. Hey Michael, I just wanted to say that I think youre adorable. So heres a comment on the sweet side. I dont usually comment, but Im sad that there were some hate filled last week, so … heres a nice one. ;)

    Rebecca

    Comment by Rebecca — February 5, 2013 @ 5:09 pm

  10. Hey Michael!

    Loved your blog, as per usual. It’s always entertaining to read and nice to hear from someone who’s been through this experience! And I’m sorry to hear that there are some haters out there.

    If I remember correctly, 2 weeks ago at the end of your blog, you said you were coming to Toronto in February. Can you elaborate on that please?! xoxo

    Comment by Kaitlynn — February 5, 2013 @ 7:09 pm

  11. Snooze… Michael and others, we all watched the show, and don’t need all you cheeseballs trying to extend your 15 minutes of fame by pretending you know how to blog (write). Really? Do we need Chris’, yours, Natalie’s,(who? Go away already) and every Tom, Dick and even a superfan Paige recap on the show? ABC, do yourself a favor and quit pimping out the actual Bachelor (this season, Sean’s) blog, and Harrison’s, add it to your own site while you’re revamping it, and get rid of these has-beens.
    Apart from the occasional newbie comment, it’s the same stalkers week in, week out. That should tell you something.
    Michael, like Arie, who also thinks he’s now a “blogger”, lol, don’t quit your day job dude.

    Comment by FlyFishMontana — February 5, 2013 @ 11:25 pm

  12. Hiiii,
    Honestly I don’t like this episode, it was boring and full of edited dramas.
    I totally agree with you about Sean’s scene with Catherine and Ashlee.
    Really feel bad for Sean when the girls get incomprehensible.
    Love ya.

    Comment by Lam — February 6, 2013 @ 6:32 am

  13. Love your blogs, but I do respectfully disagree with your comments about Catherine, and here’s why…this was clearly a difficult and mostly down week for both Sean and the ladies, the night portion of
    the group date seemed mostly cheerless, but when Catherine pulled Sean away, outside (where it must have been freezing!), they still managed to look comfy and glowing as she just naturally parked herself on his
    lap.

    Also, Daniella’s attempt to “steal Sean away” was the only one I can remember where the attempted stealer actually backs off after seeing Sean with his current lady. I feel that happens in real life as well, when you see a couple talking and laughing and it looks like they are only seeing each other at that moment — it seemed powerful enough that even the outspoken and seemingly not shy Daniella would back off from it. Even when Daniella relayed what she saw to Des, Des looked startled and a bit jealous, I think because she sees something between them, too. I adore Catherine and think they seem so natural and easygoing together. Just wanted to share my viewpoint! :)

    Comment by Deni — February 6, 2013 @ 7:41 am

  14. What are you smoking Michael? Catherine and Sean are so normal together. They just enjoy being with each other. They dont have to do “interview” type conversations. You will see it eventually.

    Comment by Jess — February 6, 2013 @ 7:48 am

  15. I can not believe a comment I just saw about you and other BachelorNation alumni blogging. OMG! If they don’t like all the blogs… don’t read them, seems like a very simple solution to me. I like reading all of them, it is nice to hear what you all who have been in these situations think. I have to say Jaclyn’s blogs are my favorite. (Sorry, Michael, don’t take offense. You couldn’t get away with saying what she can. lol) Now on to my question… What are your thoughts on any of the girls telling Sean about Tierra or any other bad things about 1 of the other girls? We see this season after season and it seems to me USUALLY the messenger is blamed, punished, however you want to put it. Emily asked the guys to tell her if there was anything and she did listen and Thanked the snitch. I think unless the person asks to be told of anything (like Emily), they should keep their thoughts and or feelings to themselves about the other girls. Even Kacie B. walked into the trap this season. (I don’t think she was staying long regardless of that situation) What confuses me the most is that these girls have watched other seasons– why don’t they think of how well tattling worked for all the others that tried it before?

    Comment by Leah VDC — February 6, 2013 @ 8:25 am

  16. Ya, NO attraction whatsoever between Sean and Catherine. What have you been smoking?
    Oh ya, I forgot. You’re Fleiss’ boy. It all makes sense.

    Comment by Canuckaluck — February 6, 2013 @ 9:40 am

  17. So happy to find your blog! You’ve always been my favorite on bachelor/bachelor pad. Hope your career is going well, st adorable.
    Jeanette
    P.S. my daughter & I watched bachelor & bachelor pad now she’s at college and we watch together online. In case you google me I’m not a weirdo mom, I have college age kids & watch with them.

    Comment by Jeanette Kraynak — February 6, 2013 @ 9:49 am

  18. FYI… 6000+ in Whitefish. Get it right. Montana is amazing. Not overcrowded with snotty rude people

    Comment by hotinmontana — February 6, 2013 @ 10:14 am

  19. Michael!
    Happy Belated birthday! i wish i could have seen you on your birthday and given you a huge, warm, loving, hug! (though i guess that would have been more of a present for me then you eh? hah)
    Anyways back to discussing the blog, dont distract me. GOSH.
    okay seriously im sorry idk why im being super sketchy im just in a mood.
    Fo real this time:
    As per usual your blog made me laugh so hard. i was literally lolling in the deep. I agree with almost everything you’ve said. except when you said you felt Catherine’s relationship with Sean was forced!!! CMON BABE! cant u see it! (sass only slightly intended) I’m def not saying shes ma fave, but when they are together i cant help but feel all cutzie and giddy inside. idk why there is jut something adorable and easy about them.
    but hey, opinions are opinions.
    i couldnt have said it better myself when you said it was awesome daniella went in for this kiss! I guess i knew she wasnt right for sean but she just seems super sweet and her mummbled comments throughout the show have been HI-LARIOUS.

    MOVING ON: so i decided to stalk your youtube channel because i have a not so secret massive crush on you! and after watchung a multitude of your videos i was just like……..wefeafqweffsdfsnwkf…for real.
    I always knew you could sing but i never knew you could SING (you know what i mean). and holy dayum youre unbeliveble. You truly swem like such a sweetheart and i wish i knew you personally. i feel like our personalities would get along great together. Your cover of edge of glory was beautiful and i love that you rock that 46 hat,. youre such a sweet guy!

    until next time my love! ahah

    PIP PIP CHEERIO ;)

    -Amanda <3 xoxo

    Comment by Amanda M — February 6, 2013 @ 11:56 am

  20. Michael, Michael, Michael…. I cannot wait to see what you say in your episode 6 blog. Probably that you dont see anything between Sean and Catherine…right? Please, they seem like the most normal. They can just be doing nothing and seem relaxed and happy. If you have not experienced this then you have not been with the right person. They make me warm and happy and makes me forget this is a show.

    Comment by Lisa — February 6, 2013 @ 12:53 pm

  21. You are too cute michael :) not always slick, but too cute!!

    Comment by Nicole — February 6, 2013 @ 3:05 pm

  22. Love your blogs! Congratulations on your engagement! All the best to you and Emily.

    Comment by Alli — February 6, 2013 @ 8:30 pm

  23. Thanks for making me smile each and every week.

    P.S. i am so happy that you have found your one and only… you deserve it! not to mention that she seems absolutely PERFECT amd stunning. You two are a beautiful couple.

    Comment by Claire — February 7, 2013 @ 12:19 pm

  24. Thanks for the recap- fun to read as always. CONGRATULATIONS to you on your engagement. So happy for you. You broke my heart on the first bachelor pad (in spite in winning!). I knew there was some lucky girl out there for you. This episode was actually very boring for me.
    ….I do see Sean and Catherine glowing around each other, but Des is a front runner to….Something about Lindsay that doesn’t sit right with me…too young? I actually feel bad for Tierra- she is just in over her head and trying to cope (as I suspect she always does) through drama to get attention. Thanks again.

    Comment by sarah — February 7, 2013 @ 5:17 pm

  25. PS I forgot to say- I’m not seeing it with Ashlee either.

    Comment by sarah — February 7, 2013 @ 5:21 pm

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