NATALIE’S BACHELORETTE BLOG: EPISODE 6

Episode 6: Worldly Gifts

Emily is off on her own without her daughter by her side in Croatia to find a “deeper” relationship with the guys. It seems highly out of place that Emily is carrying her own suitcase up the stairs here. Is this supposed to mean something? Like she is independent or something? I always picture her as high maintenance, but not in a bad way. So, ya. This was funny to me.

Emily and Travis: Balancing naked

Up until this episode, I didn’t know what Travis’s name was. He will forever be Shelley to me. Travis and Emily stroll through town doing touristy things like shopping and dancing with street performers. THEN, something crazy happens. OK not really, but Emily tells Travis that if he can’t balance naked on a stone, then he will never be lucky in love. Travis couldn’t balance for shit, and he certainly upset Emily by not taking his shirt off. To be quite frank, after watching Shelley get ready for his date, I am not super disappointed.

Travis is now doomed as they enter the dinner portion of their date. Travis tells Emily he “dates girls like her to a T.” I believe this is where he completely lost her. Emily is probably thinking, “Ah hellz na! Ain’t no girl out there on my level, son!” Travis is super sweet, but they are not connecting on a romantic level. AT ALL. Needless to say, Emily doesn’t give him the rose and the floodgates open. His limo exit reminds me of Kacie B.’s on Brad’s second season. Tears? Flowing. Anger? Lil’ bit. And then, alas, the “I’m never gonna find anyone to love me…why can’t anyone just love me” lines come out as I sit back and enjoy my white trash box wine. Do I feel bad for him? Hell ya! But am I also enjoying this? Yup. Tears are my favorite. As Shelley put it, “This sucks with a capitol S.U.C.K.” I think he spelled it out so that when Ricki is watching him in a state of devastation, she will really understand how he feels that her mommy dumped him.

On a dryer note: Emily’s black jacket was edgy and fun. I like this style on her. So much better than the glitzed out dresses I’ve been seeing on her.

Group Date: Dag-On long date

Back at the mansion, the date card arrives and a cocky Ryan finds out he will be getting the next one-on-one. I missed the next 20 minutes or so of the episode, because I blacked out at the hideousness of Ryan’s female wife beater. While this does not surprise me after the scarf incident from last week, I’m still extremely repulsed. This can’t be one of the worldly gifts he is always talking about, can it be? If so, his gifts suck ass.

The guys get to watch a children’s movie indoors in beautiful Croatia?! My God, that’s freaking sweet! I get it. Emily has a kid. But, between the Muppet’s and now this? I’m starting to wonder whether I’m watching friendships form on Barney or an adult relationship develop on The Bachelorette. I hear that next week they meet The Wiggles and Emily hooks up with the feminine one. Talk about a fantasy suite – Toot toot chugga chugga big red truck. Ya, I watch the wiggles every now and then. Step off.

These outfits are killing me. I know they are traditional and accustomed to the Croatian culture, but no American girl wants to see her man in a skirt. And no American guy wants to see his wife in a turtleneck. Well, maybe Ryan would like that. So long as she is wearing her turtleneck while she is scrubbing the floors with a baby on her back, a six pack showing through her dreadful shirt, and dinner in the oven.

Emily’s short black sequined cocktail dress set the tone for this bro-mantic group date. This dress is both sexy and classy. Since the back is opened up and the dress is short in length, the designer chose long sleeves to tie in sophistication.

The whole reason they watched the movie was to lead them into the games to compete for Emily’s heart. It’s here where Emily can tell which man is strong enough to flip her around in the bedroom… I mean, keep her and her daughter protected. I understand the significance of the movie being related to Emily’s journey, but for real people. I can’t handle this cheese. It’s constipating on so many different levels. Chris sucks at every sport even though he is hot and has a lot of muscles. Emily feels bad for him and after watching the movie, he reminds her of the character with courage and gives him the bravery mug and rose. She also tells Chris that she misses him, just as she tells everyone else as his head does this bobble head thing. I once went on a date with a guy who did that bobble head move. I tried to gross him out so that he would cut the date short. It didn’t work. Longest night of my life.

Emily tries to kiss Chris as a jaw dropping Arie and Jef watch from the background, but Chris kept it G rated, just like the movie they watched. No tongue, no love.

How in the hell is Arie not going to get the rose when he continually pulls Emily aside and is romantic? He walks her away from the party and passionately throws her against a brick alley wall as he slowly makes out with her. I mean, this is the kind of stuff you read about in adult book stores (NOT that I would know?) …he deserves points.

Emily and Ryan: Dirt Nasty

Why on Earth would Emily waste a date on Ryan? Especially this one? She clearly has way stronger feelings for Jef, Arie and Sean. I mean, there isn’t a lot of time left and you would think you would want to spend as much time as possible with the guy you hope to be engaged to, right? As Ryan gets ready for his date, I notice he puts his dirty, traveling airplane shoes on top of his clean clothes. EW! He brings new meaning to his already coined name “dirt bag.” Germ alert!

Starting the date off, it’s obvious Ryan is driving intentionally slow and talking about his great, safe driving skills to impress Emily in case he ever need to drive Ricki around. In turn, he is going to cause an accident for driving like an idiot, well under the speed minimum.

Screwing up continuously with his verbiage, Emily decides not to give him the rose. Ryan cannot handle this. He is so shocked and devastated that he isn’t the second place guy for Emily, which puts him out of the running for the next bachelor.

This gold evening gown is dreadful. I have a feeling Emily is not picking out half these clothes. When she dresses herself I can tell, because it’s more her speed and suits her personality. I like a dressed down Emily vs. a pageant girl Emily.

I mean, after calling her a trophy wife for the 90th time, did he really think this was going to help his case? His limo exit is wonderful. Probably the best I have ever seen. He is probably begging to show him as the awesome guy he is with his worldly gifts and not an arrogant asshole. Um, this proves he is arrogant. He is more concerned in his limo exit to talk about himself rather than his hurt feelings about Emily sending him packing.

Ryan’s future divorce papers:

Filing: Ryan Bowzer
Petitioner Requests: Irreconcilable differences. Bitch burnt my dinner and sent me to work with a wrinkle in my shirt. Also, she didn’t lose weight fast enough after the birth of our child. And furthermore, she is losing her looks.

Rose Ceremony: Emily is a little trickster

Arie is so excited that Emily didn’t give Ryan the rose that he sneaks out to her place to thank her and make out with her. Emily gives him Ryan’s rose, which in my opinion is a total smack in the face to Ryan. I love it! She isn’t even upset about letting him go. In fact, she is on cloud nine with Arie snuggling her bed with that awful dress still intact.

Emily struggles on whether she should send Wolf or Doug home. She goes back and forth with her decision and then entertains me by scaring them both at the ceremony, stating that she can not hand out the final rose. She leaves the room and tells Chris that she wants to hand out 2 more roses. Ah NUTS! She had me going. However, after the sweet conversation she had with Wolf about his love for his grandparents and then with Doug opening up…I am not surprised. Also, if she sent one or both of them home, then they wouldn’t have enough content for the rest of the episodes this season.

The Good:

Arie looks sharp and confident in a black an white checkered button down with a black pencil tie under a well fitted suit.

While I do love the design of this dress, enough with the sequins already! Nonetheless, she does look great with white on her bronzed, well-traveled skin. On another note, I am not a fan of her earring with this dress. Completely out of place.

The Bad:

The Wolf Man made a no no tonight. I’m not a fan of patterned ties. Stripes are cool, but not designs. His style looks like that of what an elderly man would wear.

GetzStyle Award: Arie! He is always wearing a hoodie, sporting the best casual style. I also enjoyed his rose ceremony attire:)

“Only great minds can afford a simple style.” -Stendal

Join me every Tuesday at 5:30pm PST for Gossip With Getz live on www.TheTVSpot.com.

X O X O

Natalie Getz
Twitter: @nataliegetz

29 Comments »

  1. You dress yourself from wholesale Target. Shut up. You really talk way to much and are not funny.

    Comment by Wes — June 19, 2012 @ 11:30 am

  2. Ha ha ha! You’re hilarious! Honestly, I am not a crazy fan of yours but this blog changed my mind. Keep it coming! Your comments are great and keep me laughing the entire time I read.

    Comment by Jenny1823 — June 19, 2012 @ 11:41 am

  3. I wonder why the haters just sit around waiting for these blogs to pop up on this site so that they can say something mean? Weird. And pointless! I see it happen on everyone’s blog.

    Natalie, I wanted to hear your style opinion of Ryans’ blue suede shoes! He said he wore them to impress Emily–is this a new style I’m clueless about? Or do you think he bought them the same place as the women’s wife-beater?

    Soooo glad you put the picture of Jef and Arie straining to see Emily with Chris–I was laughing so hard at that in the show! Tooo funny! Notice how much those two were hanging out together this week? Bromance!

    Comment by Beth — June 19, 2012 @ 11:44 am

  4. ..because I blacked out from the hideousness of Ryan’s wife beater…love it and love reading your blogs.

    Comment by Melissa — June 19, 2012 @ 12:12 pm

  5. http://vimeo.com/17059495

    Video of Jef above! I think he’s the best match for Emily. He’s sweet, genuine, but also has a goofy side. He doesn’t take himself too seriously. Love them together!

    Comment by Kate — June 19, 2012 @ 12:21 pm

  6. Natalie,

    Ryan is cocky but I feel like many of us probably need more a Ryan’s attitude toward ourselves. Stop being our own enemies, stop criticizing ourselves for not being perfect enough for something/somebody…Ryan definitely recognizes his own strengths and that is probably why he became a successful business owner! This is a lesson I learned from Ryan!

    cheers, Lillian

    Comment by Lillian — June 19, 2012 @ 12:33 pm

  7. This is episode 6 by the way :)

    Comment by Cecile — June 19, 2012 @ 12:40 pm

  8. Just thought you might want to correct what’s at the top of your blog…the big/bold letters say EPISODE 5.

    Comment by Jennifer — June 19, 2012 @ 12:41 pm

  9. I’m so happy you pointed out Ryan’s awful white shirt! What the heck was that?! Scary stuff. I agree about Emily’s fashion… I really don’t think she is dressing herself for the evening things… That gold dress was awful! She’s lucky she’s so good looking she call pull just about anything off. I would look god awful in some of those things! I love her laid back but chic style on the day portion of all her dates!

    Comment by Candice — June 19, 2012 @ 12:47 pm

  10. Woah natalie, either you are stalking my twitter or Chris’s resemblance to a bobble head is becoming very obvious. I can’t stop thinking that his head seems larger than the rest of his body.
    Besides that, your blog is on point. Ignore the haters. I believe they wait for the exact moment you post your blog to come on and troll for the heck of it.

    Comment by Brooklyn — June 19, 2012 @ 1:49 pm

  11. Am I the only one noticing Chris’ penchant for tan shoes with dark suits/pants? It is a huge turn off. And I’m trying to like the guy.

    Comment by Lisa — June 19, 2012 @ 4:35 pm

  12. This might sound realllly mean… but its kinda how I see it. First off, I would like to say that as soon as I saw Ryan’s female wife beater I needed to come on here and see what you had to say about it because I was so speechless about it! haha. Second, and this is the part that might come off mean but when Ryan was getting sent home he sounded like he was trying to manipulate her decision. Then it made me start thinking that he totally seems like the type to have a beautiful wife and a good life and then one day she is missing, then act like he never did anything just because he has himself convinced. Man oh my!

    Comment by Kayla — June 19, 2012 @ 5:25 pm

  13. If you continue to use sulia, I am unfollowing you on twitter. Tweets are meant to be short, thus, a tweet.

    Comment by tj — June 19, 2012 @ 6:05 pm

  14. Surprised you didnt comment on Ryans blue shoes.

    Comment by Thomas Knight — June 19, 2012 @ 10:06 pm

  15. I usually love your blog, but sweetie, the Highland Games are from Scotland, not Croatia… as you say “These outfits are killing me. I know they are traditional and accustomed to the Croatian culture, but no American girl wants to see her man in a skirt. And no American guy wants to see his wife in a turtleneck.” They are not, fortunately, from Croatia, but mimicking the them of the kid movie they just watched. They are insulting our intelligence.

    Comment by ne2pnw — June 19, 2012 @ 10:22 pm

  16. “theme” sorry not “them”

    Comment by ne2pnw — June 19, 2012 @ 10:23 pm

  17. Love your blog Natalie but there is one thing I disagreed with you on this week… The guys looked SUPER HOT in the outfits they wore for the Highland games!

    Comment by Snicker doodle — June 20, 2012 @ 4:58 am

  18. Agree with you on the earrings with the sequin white dress Natalie. It looked out of place and the gold gown is something a matron would wear.

    Comment by Maria C — June 20, 2012 @ 5:39 am

  19. Love you, Natalie – but just gotta point this out: KacieB was NOT on Brad’s season – 1 OR 2!!! She was on Ben’s 1 (& ONLY thank god!) season. ;)
    And yes, the kilts & the Highland games are fr/Scotland – (as someone else mentioned – NOT Croatia!) but apparently, they are held in many countries worldwide.

    Comment by FoxeesMom — June 20, 2012 @ 5:05 pm

  20. I am pretty sure that the shirt Arie had on with the black and white checks is Jef’s. Jef wore it to the rose ceremony last week. If BFFs can’t share clothes then what the heck are they for? Right?

    Comment by grace — June 20, 2012 @ 8:05 pm

  21. Wes: Thanks for reading my blog. Obviously you love what I have to say. And for the record, there is no such thing as “whole sale” target. Figure it out, dumb ass. Now you shut up, f-bag.

    Jenny: Glad I was able to change your mind! Sometimes I’m not a huge fan of myself and other times I’m a huge fan of myself…so, ya….I’m in your same boat!

    Beth: Thank you for sticking up for me:) And yes, his blue suede shoes were awful! When I guy doesn’t try to have good style, they have good style. (keeping it basic) BUT, when a guy TRIES to have good style and fails? It looks all the worse! I agree w/ u on Arie and Jef. They love each other! Always next to each other:) So cute!

    Melissa: Thanks!!! I appreciate the support:)

    Kate: Thanks for posting the video! I posted that to twitter and gave you a shout out. People loved it! Jef is such a cutie!

    Lillian: You may be right. He is super cocky, but we may not have seen all of Ryan. I’m sure he has a very sweet side and is possible taken the wrong way on TV b/c of his bizarre sense of humor. I’ve tweeted him a few times and he seems cool! Told him thanks for being an idiot so that I had some one to make fun of in my blogs LOL!

    Cecile: LOL right when I saw that the editors put episode 5 up there I was like, huh?

    Candice: YES! Agreed. She is gorgeous and looks great in everything, but I prefer her in her own, personal casual day wear. Or as she would put it “mom clothes” :)

    Brooklyn: LOL he should get a bobble head made after him! He is adorable…but I think the bobble is due to nerves of having a camera shoved in his face in front of a girl that intimidates the hell out of him! Thx for sticking up for me:) The haters are C.R.A.Z.Y.!!!! oh well, at least they are giving my blog another click for the site! hahaha

    Lisa: HA! I’ll have to keep an eye out. I watch the DVD they send me on my computer and miss little details sometimes. It doesn’t sound good….tan shoes? ew

    Kayla: LMAO over here!!!!!!!!!! He was totally trying to change her mind. I can’t believe she kept him for as long as she did! Hmmm. I wish he was on Bachelor Pad so we could see more of him. He sure is a mystery!

    tj: :(

    ne2pnw: Crap.

    Snicker Doodle: Yes they still looked hot:)

    Maria C.: I’m still shocked about the dress. It was terrible! I bet Em hated it too…

    FoxeesMom: Woops!!!!!!!! hahahaha- I can’t keep track anymore lol!

    Comment by Natalie Getz — June 20, 2012 @ 10:10 pm

  22. Grace: Jef and Arie have the cutest lil friendship going on right now:) They are so cute!

    Comment by Natalie Getz — June 20, 2012 @ 10:13 pm

  23. I know. I hope he is on bachelor pad. I just hope he leaves his ex girlfriends tank tops at home!

    Comment by Kayla — June 20, 2012 @ 10:33 pm

  24. the men weren’t wearing skirts, but kilts.
    Also, everyone knows that they are of scottish tradition NOT croatian!!!

    Comment by Lynn — June 21, 2012 @ 6:32 am

  25. Loved your blog as always and also Love love love that you occasionally watch The Wiggles!!! I have nieces and nephews and sometimes those songs are kinda attached in my head!

    Comment by OCrazy — June 21, 2012 @ 10:26 am

  26. Interesting point about the black sleeves making up for the part of the dress missing in the back. Didn’t like the hideous gold dress, either, but that is the first scene I ever thought Emily was pretty – her hair tied up & back. On another blog, someone described the white dress w/flecks as looking like a formica countertop! :)

    I think Chris is one of the most handsome bachelors ever. I liked Ryan a lot, too, because he made her blush & laugh – NO one else did that for her.

    Comment by Allissa — June 21, 2012 @ 11:23 pm

  27. I love this blog. You make me laugh. I couldn’t agree with you more about the kilts — not sexy at all! I love your comments about the wife beater and Ryan’s divorce papers – ha! He is definitely the contestant out of the bunch that I would like to see on Bachelor Pad. He’s just so entertaining, though I’m sure they are editing him to look crazier than he really is.

    Comment by Phoebe — June 23, 2012 @ 4:34 am

  28. This was really funny! Although I have to disagree Chris *never* looks hot to me!

    Comment by ml — June 26, 2012 @ 7:50 am

  29. Hey Natalie,

    Just wanted to say that I am not sure if you watch the show Big Brother, but the guy, Shane Meaney wore a pink tank top just like Ryan’s on the Wed. episode tonight. Reminded me of your blog abour Ryan’s shirt!

    Comment by amanda — August 1, 2012 @ 11:06 pm

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