NATALIE’S BACHELOR BLOG: EPISODE 3

Episode 3:  Things start getting, like, “very real.” 

Sean and Leslie:  Every girls dream date is to go tour a bunch of nonsense.

Now that Leslie is in my top 3, I sincerely hope her and Sean can find love just like Brad and Emily did, er, like Ben and Courtney did, wait, um, like Emily and Jef found, no, like Deanna and Jesse found, crap, maybe like Jake and Vienna found?  Or Jillian and Ed?  Ali and Roberto?  OK, this is NOT going well.  Let’s just hope they find something, like a hundred dollar bill would be cool at this point.  Moving on…

 

Leslie M’s nude cocktail dress looked super sleek and conservative from the front, but sexy and suggestive in the back.  I’m starting to notice a trend with her and dresses that leave a lil’ up to the imagination.  This is the perfect dress for a date like this.  Who wouldn’t want to wear one of their favorite dresses to trashy Hollywood BLVD for a tour at the Guinness Book of World Records?

As Sean prepares to take Leslie to set the record for longest on screen kiss, he is very nervous, because, “3 minutes is a loooong time to kiss.”  Yep, he’s definitely a born again V.  If 3 minutes is a looooong time to kiss, then I must be very advanced here, people.

 

Within the first 5 seconds of setting the make out record, Leslie is already grabbing Sean’s hair! YOWZA!  This causes Sean to react physically; only he doesn’t realize what exactly is going on with his body.  He can’t describe it, stating, ”I can feel Leslie’s body starting to tremble.  So is mine.  I’ve never felt this feeling before.” Well let me help you out with that, Sean.  That, my dear, is a boner.  Welcome to manhood.

After showing Leslie his Dad’s photo in the Guinness Book of World Records for driving around the country the fastest or something like that (boring), and setting a new world record with her, we know Sean is not going to send her home tonight and their is zero suspense.  She gets the rose after they discuss that they are both nerds who took AP classes, which I took as well.  PSYCHE.  I have no clue what they are talking about.  I’m blonde.

Group Date:  Son of a Beach

 

Kristy annoyed probably every viewer watching this show by shrieking like a troublesome sorority girl when she hugged Sean. I can’t help but note how bad ass Kristy was trying to look.  If you are going to wear a bandana around your head, you need to dress the part entirely.  A bandana is the LAST thing that fits her personality.

Chris Harrison informs Sean’s girlfriends that they will be playing a game of Volleyball today and the losing team will have to go home…immediately.  The girls all start freaking out about this information and Taryn even claims,  ”This is the most important game of my life.”  I can’t even go there right now.  These girls are off their freaking rockers.  Catherine is the only one being playful and cute, not allowing the competition to peak her emotions.

 

 

Catherine looks very cute humping Sean here.  My only concern if he picks her is that their future daughter will be a dumb blonde with poor driving skills.

 

Kristy, Leslie, Tierra, Taryn, Catherine and Daniella get sent home and the tears start flowing.  And Kristy STILL has on that bandanna.

Sean acts like he feels terrible about sending the ladies home, but he doesn’t really care in all actuality because he gets to see Desiree again.  Sean makes out with Des and Lindsey at the party and Kacie shoots herself in the foot.  She has admittedly been a long time viewer of the show, so I was shocked when she told Sean about the drama between Jamie and Des. She tells Sean, “I don’t want to be that girl,” but she IS being THAT GIRL!  Why on Earth, after the whole Ben/Emily/Courtney drama on her season would she think it’s a good idea to say something to Sean?  Desiree and Amanda don’t like each other, but that’s it.  They don’t fight.  They are just being girls. When a girl tries to make another girl look bad on this show, it never goes over well.  Then she says, “I’m not supposed to cry this time” and walks off camera. Aww :(  She even went up to him in her breathiest, angel voice stating that the girls were so horrible that it was causing her to not be herself.  Sean calls her crazy, shit hits the fan, and she is led back to the group.

 

I know these over sized, sheer button down blouses are in right now, but I think they are horrible.  They look frumpy and dated.  Just not a fan!  I mean, let’s be real here, Kacie can pull of just about anything so she still looks good!

Amanda got the chance to steal Sean away after telling the viewing audience that she thinks he should pick her, “because, I like, have a lot to offer.” Oh boy.

Amanda tells Sean, “I have to talk to you about something serious. When you were describing the perfect girl, well, that’s me.”  She lost what little street cred she had left.  In the end, Lindsay gets the group date rose as a derailed Kacie watches on in horror, knowing her time at the mansion is going to be short lived.

 

Sean and Tierra:  Trip down memory lane

 

“Coming from someone who has had several concussions…” –Sean.  OK, now I get it. He clearly has had a few concussions if he didn’t even realize she was getting it on at the bottom of the stairwell with another man who conveniently also likes purple clothes.

 

Tierra running off and pouting worked in her favor.  Sean rushes to her side, holding her hand and flirting.  Her body language in this photo is so dramatic.  Pull it together, sister.  Sean seems so into her, which is weird.  I don’t understand?  He really is all over the board!  He is growing connections with a few girls who are nothing alike at all. Desiree, Leslie, Lindsay and Tierra?  Odd combo.

Sean and Ashlee:  Six Flags.  Huh.  

 

LOVE this flirty dress!  It’s so cute and innocent.  The pattern makes the design come to life.  Sean chose the perfect girl to take on this date.  He got to know more about her past and understand more about who she is as a person.  It was really sweet to see both of their eyes light up knowing that they were doing good for others as they gave two best friends a chance to meet in real life and share a dream day together.

 

Sean’s kisses always start off the same.  He sticks his tongue out like a baby turtle (I don’t know what that looks like) and kinda pokes their mouth with it.  He was clearly NOT paying attention to Arie’s advice.

After Sean (and me) cried over Ashlee’s story of her past, I have come to realize that this man is not the least bit phony. He has a heart of Gold, and you can’t fake emotion like that.  NOW I understand why he is the bachelor.  He is all around a prize-winning catch!

The Good:

 

I’m obsessed with this hot pink dress! Sarah knows how to dress to flatter her bust line in a classy, yet sexy way.  The fact that Sean brought her dog to the house in a limo is freaking fantastic!  I wasn’t attracted to Sean until this episode.  He is no joke the real deal definition of the “perfect” man.  After he shed some tears for Ashlee and now this?! I’m kinda crushing on his personality!

 

Desiree’s frock is outstanding!  I’m normally not a huge fan of cut out dresses, but this one is in good taste and cut out in appropriate areas.

 

Kacie went out with a bang.  She is wearing a sporty cocktail dress that is edgy and different.  I’m a HUGE fan of exposed zippers and color blocking done right.  In fact, from the hair to the dress to the makeup, this is hands down the most gorgeous I’ve ever seen Kacie look!

 

This color is certainly worn by several at this rose ceremony.  Daniella’s dress grew on me as the night advanced.  That, and I seriously want to be friends with her one day because she is hilarious, so I have to start saying super nice things about her clothes.

 

Her exit was super awkward.  Don’t know if you all caught it, but when she was exiting the mansion she kept looking at producers asking which way to go.  Come on, everyone knows when the pimp don’t give his bitch a flower she go out the front door.  However, her dress was one of my favorites tonight.

 

The Bad:

 

Leslie’s taste in cocktail dresses sure isn’t wonderful.  I don’t find crotchet attractive and she seems to be very into this.  At least she got the color right!  Electric Blue is a great choice to compliment her skin and hair.

 

Catherine was shopping at Justice.  I just know it.  This is a sundress you would put a kid in.  I like this girl, but not this dress.  Robin, on the other hand, looks sleek and sexy in a blue, tight fighting strapless Bodycon dress!

 

Patterns never look good on TV, and I’m not saying I dislike her dress, I just think it’s the wrong choice for a rose ceremony.  It looks like something a hot Mom would wear to church.

 

Kristy threw her head in her hands and sobbed claiming, “I hope I find love someday!”  This translates to, “I hope America feels bad for me and even though I only went 3 episodes, maybe I still have a shot at being the Bachelorette if I cry hard enough.”  Seriously, to cry this hard after never even having a 1 on 1 date with a guy who is making out with ass loads of other women worry me about her future.  I actually have known some girls to get upset after a 2-week fling and I never understood it.

 

Last time I saw this pattern, it was the wall paper of a cheap hotel my work put me up in.  Needless to say, I’m a spoiled jerk and ended up checking out 5 minutes later.  Sorry Taryn.  Sorry I don’t like your dress and sorry Sean didn’t give you his born again flower.

If I were Sarah, I’d probably slip fat pills in all the girls’ vitamins when she was at the house alone.

Botox Diaries:

I know you will all hate me for pointing this out while she is crying, but that’s one beautiful, stagnant forehead!

 

I’m all about a little Botox, but this is just too much!  Even baby’s foreheads wrinkle when they make this expression.  She is far too young for such high doses of botulism!

 

Top 3:

Desiree

Ashlee

Daniella

See you tonight at 7pm PST for, “Gossip With Getz” with my ever so charming co-host, Mike Kelton.  Please follow me on twitter for information on how you can join us LIVE!

 

X O X O

 

Natalie Getz

Twitter @nataliegetz

GetzStyle.com

28 Comments »

  1. Love your blog Natalie!! You are hilarious! I realize that Tierra has massive botox but then what is with the big crevasse in her forehead?!

    Comment by Michelle — January 22, 2013 @ 12:21 pm

  2. omg i totally agree about sean’s kissing style. GROSS!!! did you notice he also drinks like that? watch when he takes his next sip of bubbly. josie, grosie!

    i heart sean too. he is too good to be true! though how can he fall for tiarra’s childish antics? i was hoping for much more drama, nobody even PUSHED her down those stairs! and why didn’t ABC force her to go to the hospital? i guess they welcome law-suits. i hope someone tells her that her little act kept miracle-children waiting to meet and get into six flags for their dream day. JERK. she needs a good slap in the face.

    lastly, i WANT leslie m’s dress from the Guinness kiss portion of the show. that would look awesome on me too!

    Comment by jan brady — January 22, 2013 @ 12:51 pm

  3. You are so funny Natalie ! And spot on with your blog !

    Comment by Melissa — January 22, 2013 @ 12:53 pm

  4. Seriously what is up with these baby turtle (!) kisses? Wedding dress Lesley has some crazy sucking technique going on as well, like she is sucking an ice cream cone. So gross! For a ‘romantic’ show, all the make out scenes are a TURN OFF! In other news, hope Tierra doesnt run away with the purple shirt dude ;)

    Comment by Candice — January 22, 2013 @ 1:06 pm

  5. I have a question: How did Bach Nation allow Sean to get Magic Mountain all to himself? I mean, MM would have lost hundreds of thousands…maybe millions? Did Fleiss pay that? How much did Fleiss give MM for Sean’s date or was MM just banking on publicity?

    Comment by helen — January 22, 2013 @ 1:08 pm

  6. I couldn’t stop laughing outloud at your first paragraph. And they expect us to believe this one is gonna last? Yeah, sure, and the Easter Bunny is real, so is the Tooth Fairy.
    Loved this blog.

    Comment by Trisha — January 22, 2013 @ 1:21 pm

  7. It never fails- I’m cracking up! I’m sitting in class, not supposed to be on my phone and I’m literally LOL’ing. Occasionally I think “aw that’s so mean” and then I think- “no! That was SO true! And hilarious” :) ill think it, you blog it!! :)

    Comment by Shirae — January 22, 2013 @ 1:29 pm

  8. Freakin’ Natalie! nails it again. I thought the same thing when he said his body wsa trembling, I thought, dude your getting ready for the big “O”. I personally love Leslie, I think she is adorable, and she seems to be a gr8 match for him, nerdy, but cute. I know who he picks, will not say a word, so it’s sort of weird to me that with every girl he says, I can see myself with you, and I am creating strong bonds with many of these ladies, dude, it’s been 3 minutes, oops, 3 weeks. seriously? He so wants to get married. Now, in sticking up for him…His dates are fun, well, a little more fun than the last couple of seasons at this point. I like that he is a jokster, sick of seeing him shirtless, ok, Im 48, so what. I like a little belly, shoot me! Loved the “smack” sportswear, could be bias, I know the owner. Cute, too bad I couldn’t be seen in one, Nat, you would look adorb in one. In terms of the fashion..No cinnabons this week, thank god, loved Kacie’s dress, she could sport a paper bag and look good, she just has the confidence and body to pull it off. Can’t wait until tonight, #peanisbutter

    Comment by Donna — January 22, 2013 @ 2:18 pm

  9. Kacie, you did the same thing on Ben’s season by complaining to Ben about Courtney. When are you going to learn? Men want to make their own decisions about a woman. You don’t know men. Don’t take the parent approach and think men won’t put up with “drama.” That was hardly drama. I can see deep down you’re very conservative and most men just aren’t. I was on your side but telling guys their making mistakes talking to women is not going to win their heart.

    Comment by Jenna — January 22, 2013 @ 2:42 pm

  10. Tierra is a moody bitch. She acts like she’s acting. I hope she gets sent home next week. Des is seemingly phony as well. I think Sean can see that also. So many selfish girls!!!

    Comment by Mandy — January 22, 2013 @ 3:43 pm

  11. Natalie, your blogs keep getting better and better! You are so funny! I agree with your top 3. AshLee was so sweet and I think she and Sean would be great. I hate to point things out, but the first time you mentioned Des and Amanda you accidentally put Jamie and Amanda! Whoops! Not a big deal. Also, the pictures are a little dark (at least on my computer), but I suppose that doesn’t matter. Anyway, just wanted to say that I loved your blog. Keep it up!

    Comment by Beth — January 22, 2013 @ 3:55 pm

  12. Team Leslie!!!

    Comment by Melonie — January 22, 2013 @ 4:05 pm

  13. Michelle: Thanks girl! I think Tierra’s crease is a grouchy mark. A lot of grumpy people get that daggar. If it’s a scar, then I’m a dick head. But even without the scar she would be grumpy looking lol!

    Jan Brady: OMG I thought the same thing about Tierra! She totally held up the day for the miracle children at the theme park! I would feel like a moron if I were her. How embarrassing!

    Melissa: Mucho Gracias!!!!!!!!

    Candice: He certainly is a tongue poker. Also, Leslie was trying to set the record for longest on air hump sesh. REDIC!!!!!!

    Helen: THat’s a good question and I honestly have no clue. I’m assuming they closed down the park on a slow day and did it for the publicity. Shutting down the theme park prob lost them money, but they will make it back with all the press they got. I’m sure they were more apt to shut it down since it was also a dream day for the 2 girls:)

    Trisha: LOL! Well said!

    Shirae: That goes through my head non stop…”That is really inappropriate. Should I or shouldn’t I?” LOL! Glad I could keep you company in class:) If I had a phone with an internet connection on it in college, I would have failed! #ImOld

    Donna: I prefer a little belly too:) Sean’s six pack makes me wanna vomit. LOL! But seriously, I am not a fan of abs on men. Can I say I’m still laughing out loud about your hash tag? #Penisbutter AMAZING! See you tonight!

    Jenna: I feel like she was extremely tipsy. I could see it in her eyes when she was talking to Sean. I was so shocked she did that! You are right…no guy likes girls who drag the drama to their attention!

    Mandy: Agree with everything you said, except for her getting sent home. I love watching the villian haha! It makes such hilarious TV! And I need people to make fun of. Running out of them already this season:( lol

    Beth: Thanks Beth! :) And lol! I ALWAYS mess up the names! There isn’t even a Jamie on this season hahaha! Woops! PS- I wish the pics could be brighter:( It’s the brightest screenshot we can get.

    Melonie: Which Leslie? I’m assuming the blonde, right? I like her too:) She is a smart version of El Woods. LOL;)

    Comment by Natalie — January 22, 2013 @ 4:56 pm

  14. Sean picks Catherine in the end.

    Spoiler Alert

    and I hope it works out for them. I don’t see Sean settling like Ryan did with Trista. Because that would be a sad life full of regret. I feel sad for Ryan.

    Comment by Moto — January 23, 2013 @ 1:51 am

  15. Ugh, Moto – really? What’s the point of spoiling it for the rest of us?? Ruined the season for me and we’re only 3 episodes in… not cool.

    Comment by June — January 23, 2013 @ 8:29 am

  16. Seriously you write my favorite Bachelor blog. Always LOLing!! I don’t even read the others anymore, so boring!! Keep it up!

    Comment by Mandy — January 23, 2013 @ 9:07 am

  17. Natalie, you are even more awesome because you replied to all of us! Thanks girl, it’ll def keep me coming back.

    Also, I hope you can remove “Moto’s” comment, it sucks when people are so immature and bring spoilers in the comments!

    Comment by Michelle — January 23, 2013 @ 11:04 am

  18. June: Don’t listen to moto! Spoilers aren’t always right and I feel this season is off. Keep watching! :)

    Mandy: Hahaha Thanks so much! Makes me feel good that I can entertain ya;)

    Michelle: You all are awesome b/c you read my blog and keep me coming back:) I’ll reply to any Q’s you have just let me know!!! I’ll ask the people in charge of the site if they can remove moto’s comments. I agree, it’s super annoying!!!!

    Comment by Natalie — January 23, 2013 @ 2:21 pm

  19. This was really good! You’ve gotten much better and I enjoyed every word.

    Comment by jessie — January 23, 2013 @ 3:48 pm

  20. Natalie, I think there was a mistake, because you show Daniella (blue dress) getting a rose. And then the next picture is of someone leaving in a black dress, and you say “Her exit was super awkward”. The person leaving was Kristy.
    Also, as I read somewhere else, when they filmed the trip to Magic Mountain, it would have been after summer, so the park has days when it isn’t open…so the show could have gotten the place to themselves without it costing major bucks.

    Comment by Jennifer — January 23, 2013 @ 5:13 pm

  21. ….OH my dearest Natalia!……i have been dying to read all your blogs about “Bach Sean”….and i just did!…..just caught up!….and YOU….YOU are friggin’ just gettin’ better and better!……ya’ made me laugh , cry and spew coffee out me ‘ nose!………can i PLEASE just start with , the “baby turtle thing!”…..and although you are just coming to the “SEan Party’….LOL….(i know he is not in your wheelhouse, exactly)….you KNOW i’ve been a SEAN fan from “jump street” ALL LAST SeASON…….he is a blonde version of my hunky hubby…..even all the dorky parts!……HOWEVER, where on earth did he “develop” this ridiculous technique!!!…..i think he took ALL of ARie’s advice and went coo-coo!…..can someone please tell me , i’m NOT the only one, that thought that was the MOSt awkward, and icky kiss EVER on screen…..5 seconds was too long…..but almost 4 minutes!…..OY VEY!…..i seriously thought i was being “punked”…..i have always thought a “Make out” session was something that involved a little tongue….i’m pretty sure when he was kissing “Emily” agains the wall last season….their lips NEVER parted…..(which i thought was the only stipulation!)…..it was seriously like watching my sister kiss my grandpa!…….i swear, i thought when the “bell rang” he would finsih up with a “Proper Kiss”…..at the risk of sounding perverted here….listening to my own thoughts…….what they did was just “PRess LIPS” together!…..and THAT is what the AWARD should state…..sorry, i’m goin’ on about this….but it was the ELephant in the ROOM for me!…..the last thing i will say about this…..he made his father’s record look HOT!……..anyway, NOT to trash the Hottest bachelor since “Travis Stork n Lorenzo Borghese” (sean is a combo of those two)…….Sean, STOP taking kissing advise from kissaslopagus race car drivers……you are losing yer’ technique!!!…….go back to “EMily/WALL” clips…..and lose the “turtle thing!….”…….

    …on a serious note, Nat, how do you get your “fashion info” on what the girls are wearing….do you just “KNOW” because of your awesome instincts, or do you get a “cheat sheet” are you researching, or what???……i am consistently fascinated on how you know what they are “wearing”….???……not sure if you read Dana Weiss’ blog….but she mentioned that one of the gals….i think Des….designed her own gown…..that gorgeous RED gown!…..OMG!….now, how does she know that?……that is AMAzing info…….and quite a designer if that is true!?………

    ….anyway….as we both know, the girls in the “background” that we hardly see and hear from….are the ones to watch….the ones under the radar….i see quite a few beauties STILL, that are yet to be “Highlighted”…..think “BEN”….we didn’t even know his name til like episode 6!…..so i’m not nearly invested in the “Names” yet…i will let you do that for me…..i just needed to comment on the “dramatic Tierra”……..i kinda hate that she is the “villain” as she looks SO much like my favorite TV actress: Mariska Hargitay! (look it up)…..it’s so hard to dislike her…..but she is making it easier each day!…..as far as her forehead…..Mariska seems to even have that same look……botox aside….just looks like a “genetic feature” to me!……she is Gorgeous, but her personality makes it easy to pick on her subtle flaws…….the only thing i know…..is she is NOT for sean!………..i kinda think Sean (which i had NO idea is a born again V….is that true?)….is looking for a little spice….that is why he is drawn to the Gorgeous Gals of different Races and Colors!…..(i LOVE that about him!)…..he needs a goofy, spicy Heart o’ Gold sweetie…..just like himself…..but, someone that will KEEP him on his toes!…..because Although he is Humble, he KNOWS he has the “GoodS”…..and needs a Hot Mama to keep him in his place….next to her!…..

    ThaNK YOU for BEInG a Consistent over the years!…….YOUR blogs are the BEST!…..Don’t hold BACK!……..OH oH, “ADvanced Placement”……hahahaha!…..you crack me the F up!……i took them as well!………i’m blonde at heart as well!…………Fuuugehht’uhhh’boww’ett!…….NaTGetz it GOOD!…..chat ya later……Pam….xoxo (ps…typing like a loon- fast and furious…not gonna proof read…..i’m cray like that!….sorry for ALL grammar and spelling mistakes!……………XOXOX Boom!

    Comment by Pamela B... — January 24, 2013 @ 5:38 am

  22. Best quote of your blog “That, my dear, is a boner. Welcome to manhood.” Hysterical! I thought the same exact thing, he’s getting excited about a very awkward kiss with loads of people watching. Weird. He definitely should have taken at least SOME of Arie’s advice on kissing. hehe!
    A question for you as someone that’s been on the show – do the producers not tell the girls where they’re going or AT LEAST what type of date they’re going on? I would have been so uncomfortable walking around in high heels and a “whohaa high” dress at an amusement park. I think AshLee looked beautiful but if chose that outfit knowing where she’s going…eek!
    Could those dents in Tierra’s forehead be from the botox?

    Comment by Amy — January 24, 2013 @ 6:48 am

  23. I’ll bet the two best friends – and the more important part about the two friends with a chronic disease – have waaaaaaaaay more tragedy in their lives than AshLee. Sadly, ABC left us weeping over a beauty who will do fine, while these sweet girls may not even live throughout their whole lifespan. Why does ABC even give lip service to this kind of charity if they can’t do it right? It ends up being aggravating to people who actually know what mitochondrial disease is.

    Comment by marti — January 26, 2013 @ 11:31 am

  24. Here’s hoping Fleiss has fleissed RS. Sue that guy for everything he is worth as he needs to be taught a lesson. Great blog Natalie! Keep it coming!

    Comment by justsayin — January 26, 2013 @ 6:52 pm

  25. Kacie was wearing a speedo turned mini…awful.

    Crotchet? I think crochet may have been the intended word.
    Was that a play on crotch?

    Comment by spellingnazi — February 3, 2013 @ 2:52 pm

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    Comment by game — February 7, 2013 @ 1:11 am

  27. Muy bueno. Me gusta mucho el modo en que se expone. Un abrazo!

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