Natalie’s Bachelor Pad House of Style Blog: Episode 1
Episode 1: Dramapalooza
What do you get when you combine 18 people who love/hate/fight/break-up/make-up/and back stab each other all under one roof? Yes, that’s right, you get Bachelor Pad Season 2. This is definitely not the same show I was on! It’s completely different, because friendships formed before Bachelor Pad 1 were based on good intentions. We didn’t even know that Bachelor Pad existed. We became friends because we wanted to be friends, not for any other reason. This season’s cast obviously knew about the show, so I guarantee you friendships were formed before moving into the house for sheer strategic purposes. I can’t wait to watch what is literally the most “dramatic season” unfold. After watching the back-stories of the new cast of bachelor pad, I’m having a hard time understanding why some of them are still single! I’m lying, it’s obvious. Let’s get started on this drama infested, juvenile, ridiculous rat race to a quarter million dollars! Chris Harrison told me that this was not the same show I was on… and that was an understatement. This is already way more dramatic in the first 10 minutes than our whole season was. I’m not going to name names because some of these people are my friends, but watching people tell straight up lies is ridiculous. It’s already full of deceit!
Moving into the Pad:
People are s*#t talking each other before they even enter the mansion and get a chance to defend themselves! This is amazing! I feel like I’m watching “Bad Girl’s Club,” not “Bachelor Pad” on ABC (a family channel). Everyone is smack talking, jabbing knives and placing bad thoughts about cast in other’s heads before everyone even has the chance to meet each other and form their own opinions! In a nutshell, Holly starts by not wanting her ex-fiancé in the house so she can flirt, Erica starts talking trash on Vienna, Vienna talks trash on Jake, Gia talks trash on Vienna, Blake talks trash on Erica, Rated WTF talks trash on Kasey AND Vienna (just as Kasey pulls Vienna away to make sure she is okay, which is absolutely adorable by the way…he puts her before the game), Michelle and Jackie talk trash on each other, Vienna and Kasey talk trash on Jake, and Jake acts like he is the nicest guy in the world as he enters the war. Whew. Breathe. That was a lot to take in. Pretty much the only people without issues so far are William, Ames, Ella, Kirk and Alli. Let the freak show begin!
Rated R has a huge chip on his shoulder and is acting too cool for the Pad (AHEM-NO ONE IS TOO COOL FOR THE PAD). He claims, “Rated R, The Reality Star is here.” Really? Within 10 minutes of this episode I have to chug a glass of wine to refrain myself from vomiting over stupid comments such as this. He was so awkward with his planned out (but not well thought out) entrance into the Pad. Okay, Rated Nerd, you are already making yourself look really stupid. No one likes a d-bag, but clearly you did not get that memo. Every time you speak it’s such a ridiculous statement. Reality Star? Really? You actually call yourself that? Let’s get this straight, you are not. No such thing. Reality is 15 minutes and you just ruined your chance at redemption. I’m obsessed with Canada and you need to rep it better! Meanwhile, Gia and Vienna are already fighting and only half the cast has moved in at this point. THIS IS AMAZING! Kasey moves in, and Rated Annoying gave the thumbs down to Kasey behind his back as Kasey continues to say “hey buddy!” Rated “Arrrr” then continues to rip apart Kasey and the woman whose heart he is guarding and protecting. Oh boy, Jake is officially in the pad! Jake says to Kasey, “Hey! Yeah, I know who you are! Terrific!” Just as I’m thinking how cliché Jake sounds by literally talking about the weather, I hear someone in the background say, “Who really talks about the weather?” Took the words right out of my mouth. I could go on and on with commentary about the drama and hilarious comments I keep hearing from this season’s cast, but this blog would be about 100 pages.
Sadomasochism Challenge: Hook Up (I’m gagging right now)
Gia WOULD flock to William! She flocked to the weatherman! Her strategy is always to get the underdogs on her team, because she knows it’s so easy to do. I love that girl! So everyone has strategy as to why they picked certain partners to, uh, hook-up with. Smart. I’m so irritated that they get competitions that require strength. That was my strong point! I’m already jealous that they have better challenges than my season. I overhear someone say, “This is harder than I thought.” That’s EXACTLY what she said. OF COURSE it comes down to Jake/Vienna/Kasey. Good Lord this is amazing television. As Jake makes some metaphorical, super dorky and morbid reference to Jackie falling from a cliff and he is her hero, Vienna falls from Kasey’s legs. I love Jackie and I’m thrilled she gets the safety rose, however, I really wanted Kasey and Vienna granted safety as well.
I must say, even though I am not a part of this game, I controlled the beginning. I gave advice to a select few friends and they are doing exactly what I told them to do. They listened well, now how far will it get them? I’m thinking top 6. Nice work, guys. The “insiders” realize they need Rated R to help seal the vote. What. Is. He. Wearing.
Justin’s shirt is Rated F…..on a good day. My feelings are so hurt that a former contestant had the nerve to do this to me. I want to gouge my eyeballs out of my head! This mix of Ed Hardy and Affliction causes me to fast forward through this scene, which pisses me off because I’m missing vital information. For the love of fashion, Justin! Is there something wrong with your mirror? And more importantly, who are you hanging out with in real life that also thinks it’s okay to dress this way? Friends don’t let friends dress poorly. Once again, we have a Juan aka Rated R, who is trying to play both sides.
Gia is once again in the outsiders group. I hope Gia can come up with a better plan! She would have been smart to form an alliance with Graham since she already knew him from living in NYC. Instead she is on Jake’s side, which is not looking good for her. I hate to say this to some of my closest friends, but Michelle, Kasey, Vienna and Michael…what in God’s name were you thinking reaching out to “Rated R the Reality Star?” I expect more from you guys next week, ugh!
Jake and Jackie:
As gorgeous as Jackie is and as much as I LOVE her, their date was really boring. Poor Jackie! The whole time they had to talk about Jake and Vienna’s breakup. What about Jackie? On a date, a man needs to ask a woman about herself! YAWN! Question: why is Jake acting like he isn’t over Vienna? I’m going to keep my mouth shut, but giving the rose to Vienna makes Jake look incredibly fake. Wait, I can’t keep it shut. I’m a damn motor mouth. Jake, this front you put on is just ridiculous. Aside from all of this, a date overlooking Hollywood Blvd. is like a date overlooking white trash, drugs, and vomit. If you have never been to Hollywood, don’t waste your time or money. It’s a terrifying, nasty place.
In honor of the weatherman, Blake states, “there seems to be a pretty good storm cloud, you know, building up steam.” That is an understatement, Blake. This is an earthquake just starting to shake the Pad. Across the mansion, Alli attempts to play both sides, just like Jessie Sulidis from season 1 did. Bad move, Alli…bad, bad, move. In my opinion, Vienna is being the smartest player in this game. She understands all of this and is one step ahead of everyone else in the house. Only problem is, the quiet sniper wins, i.e. me! I had my team, trusted them, and had fun. I kept conversations quick and to the point. I then continued to have fun and hold on to that trust. If you are too vocal in this game, it will get you in the hot seat more quickly then the quiet members of your team. Jake, who is still in love with Vienna, is more than excited when Jackie brings up voting out Kasey. You can’t hide a smug grin, Jake! This is the Jake I like, a normal human being with faults.
Gia and Kasey held together their alliance. Thank God they both held true to their word, otherwise, the irony is that they would have sent each other home. They didn’t even realize that they both single handedly held the power to send the other home. Gia is such a sweetheart and Kasey is a man of his word.
Alli claims, “I typically get along better with guys.” This is an awful quality in a woman. A girl who has more guy friends than girlfriends is generally the one who is causing the problems! Alli seems so sweet, but she really played a poor game. I felt bad for her as she left, because everyone was still laughing about Rated Annoying as she walked to her limo and didn’t even say goodbye! I LOVE that Kasey got to laugh in Rated R’s face! Rated R made the biggest fool of himself! He wouldn’t shake hands with the dudes? Dave, Kovacs, and others have always told me that Justin is good with making girlfriends, but sucks at hanging with the dudes. Case in point, he showed his true colors. Well, he did start by calling himself a reality star. He even stole Jake’s rose! This is seriously incredible television.
Okay, so I was so wrapped up in this outrageously intense episode that I nearly forgot to talk about fashion! Don’t worry I took notes!
Michelle Money always sets the bar in style! Color blocking is HUGE right now, and she took it to the next level! She nailed down the color block trend with an electric blue satin pencil skirt and mixed it up with a loud color-schemed, printed spaghetti strap satin tank. In this same clip, notice Vienna’s sweetheart strapless dress. I love nude and black together, but I can’t make out the detail on my screen. Vienna, I will be by this week to steal that dress. You’ve been warned.
Holly looks funky and cute in a muted pink, mini feather skirt complimented by an off the shoulder black boyfriend T. Blake even noticed her outfit! Well, actually, he noticed her legs.
Chris Harrison looks casually collective in a white v-neck T-shirt underneath a vintage cream cardigan and casual olive green linen blazer. Throw that outfit together with a nice pair of dark wash denim and you have one edgy look!
Is that a Jonas brother? No, it’s Michael Stagliano! This one has some definite swagger to his formal wear. It’s hard to pull off this look without looking like a waiter in a nice restaurant, but Michael pieced everything together perfectly to look like a model in GQ Magazine. How did he pull this off? Simple. He took a basic black and white shirt/vest combo and utilized a diagonal stripped tie as his statement piece. The heather gray and light pink colors in the tie really offset the entire outfit in a good way. Leave it to Michael to add some edge by cuffing up his sleeves, creating the perfect touch to take this look from basic to hip.
Oh Blake. The last time I saw a man wear a tie clip was at church. And he was 80 years old. God bless, you sweet little thing. I forgive you, unless you are a repeating offender next week. Men, there is nothing cool about a tie clip.
Strikingly beautiful Ella made a mistake when purchasing this dress. The satin looks incredibly cheap on camera and the style seems very 2009. I’m not a fan of the color combo, and the plastic, bright blue belt certainly did not help her cause.
Red and black. You look like the Devil. Enough said. In Justin “The Reality Star’s” defense, he really is a super nice guy. I think he let being on TV get the better of him and tried to create a character for himself. Justin, I’m sorry you failed.
I have been begging and begging and begging for ABC to BRING BACK THE MASK! They listened! This outtake is phenomenal. Reading a tabloid, while on the toilet, after breaking and entering the Mansion? I’m so excited to see what else the Mask brings to the table. Is he a new contestant? Or is he simply here to make good TV? Either way, this is incredible. Thank you, Next Entertainment, for #BringingBackTheMask.
Stay true to yourself and your style. Push yourself to be original.